Sknow Magic!

There is something magical about snow.

I remember the days when I used to watch the news and read the papers. As soon as snow hit there were reports of disaster, doom and gloom all over the country. Trains weren't running because it was the wrong type of snow, people were freezing to death and cars were being marooned all over the country.

These days I do not read any papers beyond the sports pages and the news is something that I haven't watched for years. I realised one day that not since the days of John Craven's Newsround (and I'm now showing my age!) had I seen something positive on a news report.

Since our focus affects our lives, why would I want to find out lots of things that aren't working?

Today I went out walking in the snow and a lady in a car pulled out in front of me as I walked down the road. She looked at me and gave me a huge smile. I smiled back and have felt great ever since. It has not been a typical experience for me in St Albans so far.

Since the snow has come I'm sure that all of the same things that always happened are happening. However, my experience is now completely different.

My evenings have now incorporated a walk to our local lake, which has been frozen over for the past week or so. The snow-covered surroundings light up the place enough to see clearly as the moon reflects upon it.

Something that I would have taken for granted, or not even left the house to see, is now causing me an inner peace like never before. Standing on the bridge of our lake and taking in the surroundings at night, in what is usually an empty park, is something special and has led me to many profound insights.

My nephews, Connor and Kian, aged 6 and 7, stayed with me over the weekend. On Friday evening we went for a late night walk and snowball extravaganza by the lake. We ran into a group of people building an igloo – a very impressive feat. What wasn't so impressive was me falling through the wall of the entrance as I attempted to help them cover the roof.

This caused great (and understandable) irritation amongst the builders. It also prompted loud laughter from my nephews. I decided to take the blame and exit the scene as the builders of the now collapsed igloo pointed fingers at each other and the language became more colourful! My nephews giggled all of the way to the lake. It was funny and a classic example of when positive intent meets negative results. Fortunately, Connor and Kian saw the results as very positive indeed and have been laughing about it ever since!

After an hour or so of running around I took them to the bridge to stand and reflect with me.

We chatted for about half an hour and I found my eyes welling up at the profundity of what they had to say. My elder nephew, Connor, realises how lucky he is and how others do not have as much as him. His plan is to contribute his entire savings to sponsoring goats for African families.

I'm not sure that his mum and dad will be as quick to let him spend all of his savings on goats but he really wants to do it. I had no idea about the project that he was on about but now realise that it is running and the advertising must have affected him deeply.

Kian, my younger nephew, started talking about Club Penguin and saving rainforests. I had no idea what the link was until afterwards. It turns out that there is a website called Club Penguin where kids have their own penguin and collect coins for penguin accessories. Every now and again they get a chance to give coins to a worthy cause. Kian told me that he always gives coins to help grow trees. He tells me that this is – "because without trees we will be dead."

Kian also went on to say "When I was young (and he's only 6!) I thought that it was important to win all the time but now I know that it isn't always." I had never heard them share in such a light before. I let them stay out late, talked to them like adults and, suddenly, I'm faced with two philosophers.

Connor then looked up at the stars, "Isn't that nice Uncle Ads, shall we join them together and make shapes?" I hadn't even noticed them until that point.

In those moments I felt grounded, connected and truly grateful to be alive. Magic is the ability to be in the moment and usually involves doing something different to that of the masses.

I went to catch a train at St Albans station last week. It was delayed and severe weather warnings had the staff advising us not to travel. I had an event to run and had to go into London. I ended up having a drink at the station coffee shop. It soon filled up and before I knew it I was joined by three ladies. Chatting to people that I don't know has not been a regular experience for me in St Albans but lately it has.

In adverse situations community spirit is nurtured for many. More people are smiling. More people are talking. And more people are feeling better. Maybe this is just a reflection of what I am feeling at the moment. Whatever it is – it has all been enhanced since the snow started.

How I feel has now become my number one priority in life. If it feels good then I will do it. If not – it's time to do something else. Right now, I am loving St Albans, the snow and everyone who I have met or smiled at me in the past weeks. Even a simple smile has the ability to transform someone's day.

My Christmas Carol Experience

As a kid I used to ponder the logistics of Santa's task. One man and over 6 billion people to deliver to all over the planet. How did he manage to get all around the world in one night? During my following years as a nurse I also used to listen to many people review their lives. Watching "A Christmas Carol" brought on a particularly contemplative mood for me this year and I decided to review my past, present and future around London on my own Christmas Carol.

I was always told that Santa was magic and that anything was possible for him. With so many chimneys, mince pies and various drinks to consume it is no wonder that his Body Mass Index is on the high side. He consumes more calories in one night than most people do in a lifetime.

On Christmas Eve I decided to dress up as Santa again and make a few people smile around London. So, I called a couple of like-minded friends, Nicholas and Hitesh, and off we went with a free hugs sign and a few smiles.

Eighteen years ago I left my job in the city – an experience that saw fun and happiness drain from my life. I worked in a monotonous job in the documentary credits department of a Japanese Merchant bank. We decided to walk through the city at the beginning of our walk. This would be our walk into Christmas past. Our Christmas Carol had begun.

As we handed out our first hugs of the day in the city we were approached by a very stern security guard. He informed us that we had no permission to dress up and would have to leave the premises. We did almost manage to make him smile as we offered him a hug, though he did warn us that he may not respond too nicely if we did.

We smiled and walked on through the streets of the city, with most people ignoring us. However, there were several who managed a smile and a group of tourists who did call us across the road to claim some free hugs. For me it was a reminder of how soul-less I felt in my city-job years.

We then ventured towards Bond Street and a livelier atmosphere. Here we were stopped more frequently as people queued for hugs and photos. This represented our walk of Christmas present. It felt good and we had a lot of fun in the process.

During just a few hours we were stopped and hugged by people from all over the world. People from Scotland, Ireland and Wales stopped, as did those from France, Italy, Greece, Spain, Russia, Lithuania, Poland and Germany. Others stopped from China, Taiwan, Thailand, Iran, Kuwait, Lebanon, Israel Japan, Malaysia, Singapore India and Pakistan. Representatives hugged us from Mexico, USA, Bolivia, Argentina, Brazil, Chile, Peru, The Soloman Islands, Tonga, Australia, New Zealand, Egypt, South Africa, Nigeria and Mauritius.

So, I truly experienced the magic of connecting with people all over the world in one night. As we walked through the streets of London we sang songs, hugged people, witnessed more magic as children hugged us and spread the magic of Christmas to us. We were given free chocolate by a homeless guy, free mince pies from a lady in a restaurant, offered a free ride by a chap on a bike-taxi and given a free gift by one lady.

The feeling of connecting with people from all over the world is my walk of Christmas future. Nothing beats the feeling of smiling, feeling good, singing and making people laugh.

I managed to miss the last train home to St Albans. Normally, this would be a semi-traumatic experience, but not as Santa. Tubes were still running on the Northern line, so I went to High Barnet instead.

On the way I was stopped and asked for more photos and I had a sing-a-long with a group of high-spirited friends returning home. As it turned midnight I found a social gathering of friends in Barnet, who I hadn't seen for a while. I spent the next few hours with good friends, feeling great and was given a place to stay for the night.

On Christmas morning I was picked up by my sister and taken off for a great day with my family. I am feeling very grateful for being alive today.

Carlsberg don't do Christmas, but if they did…..!

I Believe in Santa All Over Again!

Yesterday I dressed up as Santa and joined some friends in London to give out some free hugs. Dressing up as Santa is something that I have done many times and I have had several free-hugging expeditions. However, I could not have prepared myself for the magical experience that I would have.

With no particular plan we drifted around London in 0 degrees. It proved to be a little cold, especially on the finger tips but we broke up our hugs with coffee shop stops and trips on the underground. At one stage we had about 15 friends giving out free hugs.

Throughout the day we gave hundreds of hugs each. This was particularly nice in such cold weather. I was also approached by several young children who wanted to be hugged by Santa. This was a wonderful experience.

Listening to skeptical views on what was in it for us was one call of the day. I was even offered money by one mum as I hugged her little girl! Disarming people about our intentions was another rewarding aspect of our day. Our aim is to spread a few smiles around London and feel good as we see the results. It is a perfect win-win investment of time.

As the day turned to night and our group thinned out we decided to go and sing some Christmas songs on the underground and hand out a few free hugs. This proved to be a great exercise in lifting the spirits of the tube. Not everyone wanted a free hug but a surprising amount of people did.

We had people sing along, lots of applause, lots of smiles and plenty of confused-looking people as we raised the energy of the tube.

When all of my fellow free-huggers finally went their separate ways it was just me heading home on the night train to St Albans. I did not anticipate that it would be snowing or that I'd have so much fun.

The train was crammed and the mood was generally low from a few returning revelers who were squashed together.

To cheer things up on a very crowded train I sung a few songs and a group of men joined in, easing the atmosphere. This also prompted a few songs from further down the carriage. About mid-way into the journey I noticed a very small boy, who could not have been more than about 5 years old. He was looking up at me, slightly bemused. I kneeled down to ask him how he was and, suddenly, all of the revelry around me stopped as the train travelers appeared to focus in on our conversation.

I had a chat with him before asking the young lad if he would like a hug. He nodded before giving me the most amazing hug of the day. It lasted several minutes and seemed to transform the mood of the train.

In those minutes something magical happened and it felt amazing. I felt the energy of the train shift as they saw Santa in action. He was clearly real for the young man and the incident brought tears to my eyes as I realised how he felt.

To touch lives in a deep and meaningful way, if only for a moment, is something that words cannot truly describe. Many people thanked me as they exited the train and I received a big cheer as I got off at St Albans. I returned home last night having people smile at me and even stop to say hello. This is not commonplace for me in St Albans with people I don't know.

For anyone who does not believe in Santa or the magic of Christmas I strongly recommend that you dress up and experience it for yourself. Today I feel better than I have all year. Yesterday I had some flu-like symptoms starting to manifest. Today they have gone and I spent most of my day in cold weather.

No amount of drugs, health care, rehabilitation or counseling will ever work as quickly as the desire to have fun, connect with people and touch lives in a meaningful way. I now believe in Santa and his magic all over again and feel very grateful for the gift that my fellow free huggers, numerous children and especially my young friend on the train home that I hugged, have given to me. Santa is, and always will be, as real as we allow him to be.

I have not felt this good in a long time.

The Penny Drops - But I Don't!

Life certainly has a laughable habit of leaving questions unanswered for years. Indeed they usually get forgotten until the answer finally pops up years later!

As a young lad my Grandad used to walk behind me and randomly trip me up. This gave him much amusement and me a few bruises along the way. Indeed, in today's climate of political correctness and rules gone mad, he may well have ended up in trouble!

Despite his penchant for practical jokes at my expense that gave him much amusement, he was always very good to me and I loved him dearly. I also, over time, became very good at adjusting my body to unexpected trips. That is not to say that I don't fall occasionally!

Last night I found myself at a country club, in the relative wilderness, when the snow decided to come down very fast and turn things very slippery and treacherous in just a few hours. When we finally left it was time for a very slow trip home on some very slippery paths.

Fortunately, my friend managed to get me almost home before I opted to walk up the final hill, not wishing him to get stuck, as happened with a few cars as I walked up it. I decided to push one out of a slippery spot and watched people fall over all around me.

On a few occasions my feet slipped on slippery patches, catching me off-guard. However, I managed to compose myself quickly and avoid some potentially nasty falls. When I finally arrived in I sat down and contemplated the gift that my Grandad gave me. It may have taken the best part of 30 years to unlock the true gift that he gave me, preparing me from a young age for such freak weather conditions!

I have been smiling all day as I remember my training all those years ago that prepared me so well for last night. I am feeling very grateful since getting in last night and loving the quirky sense of humour that life serves up on such occasions.

I dedicate this entry to the memory of my grandad, who I loved very dearly when he was alive - and even more so after my penny drop moment last night. Thank you :-)

What Happens When You Don't Eat For 7 Days?

Yesterday I finished a 7 day fast. I had done a 10 day fast last year so knew what I was in store for – at least I though I did. My memories had become very different from the true experience over time!

Detoxing is something that I do occasionally to give my system a flush and raise my energy levels. The outcomes are increased energy, motivation and drive. Not to mention extra time, where I would have been eating.

The experience also comes with challenges. Not eating is not natural to most human beings. Changing the habits of a lifetime are never going to be an easy task. I have seen my will power stretched and undergone numerous trials and tribulations in the past week.

I have also listened to numerous opinions on fasting. Most people that I spoke to believed that they would not be able to last that long. Others have told me that there are better ways to detox and some just didn't see the point at all.

Many people were impressed by my will power and wished that they could do the same. It is my belief that there are many beliefs that are incredibly restricting. It is never a case of not being able to do something like this – it is only a case of having sufficient motivation.

If your life was at stake you would most certainly be able to go a week without food.

Being a Health Consultant with a liking for coffee, chocolate, cake and pizza I take the rough with the smooth. Over the months and years I have reduced my intake of these foods and increased my healthy foods intake, yet I still enjoy indulging occasionally.

During the past week I have discovered the wonders of drinking hot water with lemon, lime, maple syrup and cayenne pepper – a veritable taste sensation. My daily drinks gave me more pleasure than I can describe!

I believe that life is about balance. Focusing too strongly on what you have denied yourself is the fast track to failure. For example, how many smokers stop smoking, only to start again? They are so focused on not smoking that they inevitably do. Only by focusing on the benefits will change ever last.

I decided to distract myself from food by focusing on what I did want. I wanted to take action on things that I was passionate about. One was feeling great (and I did during the fast) and another was running an event that could change lives in a positive way – and maintain the results.

Where do I begin?

I decided to ask the person who had made the most change in my life in a short time, Sidra Zaidi, to work with me. She agreed – that was surprisingly easy – all I had to do was ask. Secondly, we need an idea. A few hours with Sidra saw the creation of The Journey To Empowerment.

Thirdly, we need a date – we quickly agreed that we could both do the 6th December and that it was better to do it sooner, rather than later. Next we needed a venue – it seemed like a daunting experience having had no dealings with this before. So, I put a plea on Facebook for help.

Within minutes two people had given me leads. One phone call later we had a room booked at a reasonable price. Finally, we needed to create some advertising material. That night a good friend spent two hours on Skype going through our advert with meticulous detail.

The result – within two days I had taken an idea and made it real. Furthermore, I had even called another friend and arranged to get it filmed for future marketing material. This was what is possible when I channelled my focus into the benefits of the fast and the extra energy that I had. In this time I felt no hunger – hydration is a great replacement.

Fortunately, during my fast there was a time limit on how long I had to do this for. As I have no intention of giving up anything I was happy to indulge in several puff pastry mince pies upon my completion. I did this experiencing taste like I never had before.

I feel better now than I have all year – and that's after my cake indulgence. Focus, balance, belief and action are an incredible combination.

How could you feel better right now?

The Key to Happiness from my 7 year-old Mentor

Occasionally I have one or both of my nephews around to stay with me at the weekend, they are currently aged 5 and 7. This usually gives me the opportunity to regress a bit and have a lot of fun.

I get to play games and eat unhealthily for a day or two whilst they get the freedom to do pretty much what they like. As they are not ready to own the merits of eating healthily I have adopted their mentality whilst they are staying. Meanwhile, I get to pick their brains for the pearls of wisdom that they occasionally present.

I have a habit of asking them questions that I have yet to find an answer to and indeed probably never will. "What is the key to the universe?" and "What is the secret to life?" are things I have pondered for many hours.

Over the years I have asked them such questions and have been given answers that both astound and amuse. "Doing good farts," was an old favourite of them both in response to the above questions, for a good while.

Whilst sitting down for lunch last weekend I asked "What is the secret to everlasting happiness?" My eldest nephew, Connor, looked up and said "Look after yourself."

His tone was questioning, yet his response struck a chord with me. I knew that looking after myself was a good idea but I do not always do it. I do meditate. exercise and walk a lot "but I could do more," is a well rehearsed line that soon followed.

The tyranny of the word "but" suddenly came into play. In one second I had dismissed all of the good work that I do. But dismisses all of the content that has gone before it. It is dismissive, finite and pointless in a context like this.

I know that as far as health is concerned that I am in the higher reaches of the population in looking after myself. Using the word and, instead of but, is a much more productive linguistic structure after acknowledging something positive.

It is certain that I could do more to be healthier and look after myself better but (and this is a good context to use it) when I compare myself now to where I was last year I walk more, drink more water, eat healthier and exercise more. It is about momentum and mine has been in the right direction.

Most of my changes have been slight and manageable, without causing major or immediate shifts. However (a word that is virtually the same as but!) over time major shifts occur.

So, the lesson from Connor has deeper reaches. Looking after myself is not just about taking action to feel better it's about giving myself proper credit for the changes that I have made.

Part of this process is allowing myself to venture into less healthy practices occasionally, like eating occasional junk foods with my nephews. It is important for me to realize the lessons that I learnt whilst nursing. Namely, that how I speak to myself will have much more impact on my health than what I do to myself.

Only by becoming my own best friend will I ever be a truly healthy individual. The key to happiness is indeed looking after myself, by giving myself more credit for what I have done and being less harsh for what I haven't. It also helps to play a lot, laugh a lot and let loose

Pain Can Be The Path To Pleasure

Last year I had been sailing along, ignoring my feelings and signs that my body had been giving me. I was so focussed on my work project that I had neglected almost everything and everyone else in my life.

I went on to experience an episode of acute angina (or a very sharp, stabbing pain radiating out from my heart - the symptoms of this episode were unmistakable). Then, in two very painful hours I ended my relationship with my girlfriend and watched my business venture collapse, along with my finances. My life as I knew it was swept from under me.

This led to a very dark and desolate place where only emptiness existed. I can honestly say that from this place I felt no emotion. After 3 days of meditating in this emptiness I came to many significant breakthroughs in my thinking. I was able to communicate to my family from a place of humility and understanding. I was also able to see how I had created everything that had brought me to that place. This realisation allowed me to take back my power and decide to focus on positive outcomes.

Through my time as a nurse I know that there are more people motivated by pain than by pleasure. If there is not enough pleasure in my life then it was because I hadn't experienced enough pain. Speak to an average 90 year old and they will explain what suffering really is. I had my health, I had freedom of choice and I had an opportunity to turn my life around.

Now, I feel empowered to not only make the positive changes in my own life but to inspire others to do the same. Having known the emptiness of disempowerment I now embrace the alternative and live life as a game.

It is my belief that if you do not have enough pleasure in your life then you have not had enough pain. By visualising how you see your life in 10 years time you may well be able to save yourself years of suffering. Alternatively, you may already be on the path to happiness - this can only be a good thing.