What is love?

As I grew up my understanding of love was that it was a feeling of peace, connection and timeless flow that lifted one's spirits to soaring heights. However, on a more practical level, based on the fact that I loved my parents, love was an evolving package of mixed emotions that I experienced when I loved someone else whose mood kept changing. If you truly love someone you will accept any emotional state that they experience – and deal with consequences of any actions that result from it.

At a less technical level – unconditional love has no bounds.

I have often contemplated what love is and had some very different insights and opinions on the subject as time evolved. A friend once told me that it was a short-term hormonal imbalance. Whilst this has amused me for many years I think that it is a good illustration of many people's reality of love.

Love in its purest form is an overwhelming connection with someone or something. The more connections we have, the more love we allow into our lives. There may be those of you thinking that this is easier said than done – you're right. Only those of you who truly release fear by loving your past, will experience more love.

There are some things that are fact....

- Bad things happen
- It is our choice as to what is good or bad
- You have the power to choose to be happy
- Allow yourself to release your past and future and you will be in the now - this is all that is real

True love could be considered in several different ways. For some it is the happy emotional state that appears in fleeting moments of passion. For others it may be a perpetual state of connection with all that is. Either way, nobody has the same definition of what love is.

For many years I had no idea of what love was and became a bit confused. It sounded good but it hurt so much. It's capricious nature was all too confusing for my limited understanding of the subject. I thought that maybe I was just dysfunctional and that love was an alien concept to me. Fortunately, I adapted accordingly and proceeded with my life. The insight that this experience has given me is priceless.

Every experience in my life has led me to where I am now, as has yours. Do you accept the gift of all that has happened in your life to become a person of power? Power to take control of your life, love yourself and give to others by looking after yourself first.

Until you are truly grateful for all that you have you will not have love. Love is a decision – in any given moment. It's a decision to be grateful for what you have and to accept what you don't. Just by being grateful we send out positive energy, which affects everyone around us. By writing to someone and thanking them for being in your life you can transform their day. By telling them yourself you instantly transform both of your lives.

When you love someone you will accept anything they do – the moment that you don't – your love has become conditional. This is an impure love and is based on fear.

Since it is not within your power to change others at will – why not focus all of your attention on the one person who you can change at will - you. Every moment is new and you can decide to be anyone you want at any time.

The ability to really love yourself is the key to unconditional love. Although this may sound pompous or even arrogant, it is fundamental. Personally, the phrase "love yourself" had many negative connotations from my school days. These had to be released in order that I could love myself again.

A simple exercise is to close your eyes, take some deep breaths, smile and send love to your past. Thank your past for creating you and allowing you to love. Do this for as long as you like.

In the ever-evolving game of love you will find it easiest when you love yourself first. When this happens you may well find that magical things start to happen. I wish you all much love in your quest to accept yourself – unconditionally.