The Key to Happiness from my 7 year-old Mentor

Occasionally I have one or both of my nephews around to stay with me at the weekend, they are currently aged 5 and 7. This usually gives me the opportunity to regress a bit and have a lot of fun.

I get to play games and eat unhealthily for a day or two whilst they get the freedom to do pretty much what they like. As they are not ready to own the merits of eating healthily I have adopted their mentality whilst they are staying. Meanwhile, I get to pick their brains for the pearls of wisdom that they occasionally present.

I have a habit of asking them questions that I have yet to find an answer to and indeed probably never will. "What is the key to the universe?" and "What is the secret to life?" are things I have pondered for many hours.

Over the years I have asked them such questions and have been given answers that both astound and amuse. "Doing good farts," was an old favourite of them both in response to the above questions, for a good while.

Whilst sitting down for lunch last weekend I asked "What is the secret to everlasting happiness?" My eldest nephew, Connor, looked up and said "Look after yourself."

His tone was questioning, yet his response struck a chord with me. I knew that looking after myself was a good idea but I do not always do it. I do meditate. exercise and walk a lot "but I could do more," is a well rehearsed line that soon followed.

The tyranny of the word "but" suddenly came into play. In one second I had dismissed all of the good work that I do. But dismisses all of the content that has gone before it. It is dismissive, finite and pointless in a context like this.

I know that as far as health is concerned that I am in the higher reaches of the population in looking after myself. Using the word and, instead of but, is a much more productive linguistic structure after acknowledging something positive.

It is certain that I could do more to be healthier and look after myself better but (and this is a good context to use it) when I compare myself now to where I was last year I walk more, drink more water, eat healthier and exercise more. It is about momentum and mine has been in the right direction.

Most of my changes have been slight and manageable, without causing major or immediate shifts. However (a word that is virtually the same as but!) over time major shifts occur.

So, the lesson from Connor has deeper reaches. Looking after myself is not just about taking action to feel better it's about giving myself proper credit for the changes that I have made.

Part of this process is allowing myself to venture into less healthy practices occasionally, like eating occasional junk foods with my nephews. It is important for me to realize the lessons that I learnt whilst nursing. Namely, that how I speak to myself will have much more impact on my health than what I do to myself.

Only by becoming my own best friend will I ever be a truly healthy individual. The key to happiness is indeed looking after myself, by giving myself more credit for what I have done and being less harsh for what I haven't. It also helps to play a lot, laugh a lot and let loose

The Yin and Yang of a Good Wedding Celebration!

Last weekend I went to Ireland to attend the wedding of a very good friend of mine. Weddings always bring together an interesting mix of people and this was no exception.

I have known the groom for over 16 years, along with many of his other friends. Some I have not seen for a few years now but it was not a consideration as we spent the day/night catching up with them. It would also be fair to say that I was not exactly shining in my status as a Health Consultant during this event as I toasted the happy couple - many times!

For me, health and wellbeing are not just about treating my body as a temple all of the time. Although I do this most of the time I am inclined to have glitches now and again. That said, what constitutes a health glitch? I have known fitness fanatics who collapsed and died, eventhough their bodies were temples their minds' were not.

The fact is that a healthy mind is at least as important as a healthy body, indeed the two cannot be separated when it comes to health. Catching up with good friends is one of the fastest restorative remedies available today. I had a great time, loved the occasion, the people and the entire weekend.

In attendance was a Sister, called Mary. She had spent her life dedicated to helping the homeless and must have been in her late 70's. This did not stop her from taking over the dance-floor with a humour and energy that left many half her age to shame. I smile every time I think of her in action.

Yes, I did start the next afternoon with a hangover after many hours of merriment at the wedding. This was nothing that several pints of water and a long walk could not remedy in a relatively short period of time. The rest of the weekend was spent with a friend taking life very easy indeed as "normal" service resumed.

So, I may not have had the healthiest weekend from the traditional definition of the word but I will smile every time that I think back to that weekend. The memories that I have will far outweigh any short-term glitches caused by alcoholic indulgence! It's a wonderful thing to have great friends and so many in one place at a time. How great life can be.

Chumbawamba

In the immortal lines of the song by Chumbawamba a decade or so ago, "I get knocked down but I get up again - you ain't ever gonna keep me down...."

This is a wise philosophy for anyone who is pursuing their dreams or Life Purpose. I frequently have to remind myself of these words as I put the message of Walk Innovation out to the general public. It has been a long hard lesson in what doesn't work for me in the marketing arena over the past months in St Albans as only a few people have trickled into my events.

However, as Thomas Edison once said, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that don't work."

Pursuit of a Life Purpose is a quest of belief, congruence and persistence. Today I have been in contact with the local business agency, radio station and networking group. All have offered to help me publicise my events. This represents a nice step in the right direction.

Keeping focus on the bigger picture of what Walk Innovation aims to do - helping attendees to help themselves, have fun and help the planet for our future generations - is where I always come back to. Nobody has achieved great things without challenges. It is how we respond to such challenges that will ultimately dictate the quality of our lives.

Right now I have had a huge rush as a downward turn of life's rollercoaster hits the bottom. Fortunately, the next part of the ride necessitates a swift movement up - I'm ready for that. Indeed, it just adds to life's rich tapestry.

Transforming negativity into hope, focus, purpose and action is a perpetual path. It may not always happen instantly but it always happens to me. The alternative is misery and my years as a nurse have shown me where that path leads - not for me thanks!

As long as I still have my health I am a happy man. It is an unfortunate truth that many people may never realise this until their health has gone. It will never be enough to make them happy when they have good health but it will certainly compound their misery when they do not.

Being grateful for what we have is the easiest route towards changing stress into happiness. Alternatively, you could just complain to someone about life's trials and tribulations - this is a great way to drain the energy of those who you care to share such stories with.

What is Purpose and Why Do We Need It?

  As a nurse I spent many years working with people in the twilight of their lives. Some were not too happy with the cards that life had dealt them. Others were the embodiment of joy, awareness and compassion. What was the difference between them?

  The recurrent thing that was present in those who appeared happier was a greater purpose in life. Some people knew exactly what their gift were - and how to use them. So, what is purpose?

  According to Dictionary.com, purpose is...

pur⋅pose

  [pur-puhs]  Show IPA noun, verb, -posed, -pos⋅ing.

–noun

1.	the reason for which something exists or is done, made, used, etc.

2.	an intended or desired result; end; aim; goal.

3.	determination; resoluteness.

4.	the subject in hand; the point at issue.

5.	practical result, effect, or advantage: to act to good purpose.

–verb (used with object)

6.	to set as an aim, intention, or goal for oneself.

7.	to intend; design.

8.	to resolve (to do something): He purposed to change his way of life radically.

–verb (used without object)

9.	to have a purpose.

  If, as suggested, purpose is the reason why something exists then surely it is our duty to know exactly what our purpose is. If we don't know why we exist then things are likely to get confusing, upsetting or even dangerous. If we are not focusing on our purpose and our gifts then we are probably focusing on our irritations and faults.

  It's been an interesting few weeks for me. I have been stretched on many fronts as I piece together the elements of my vision for Walk Innovation with the practicalities of operating in the world of business. 

  The fact is that during my career as a nurse I just hadn't considered entering the business world and what it would entail. Fortunately, I have been focused on my purpose in life and why it is important for me to keep going, regardless of any obstacles.

  I have been asked on numerous occasions "What is Walk Innovation?" I have yet to give a consistent answer as I don't believe that it can be described. Through contemplating this question for many hours I finally feel that I can express Walk Innovation through words alone.

  Walk Innovation is a process where gratitude and positive focus meets action. Our ability to get results in our life is directly proportionate to our belief in our life's purpose. When we have a big enough purpose it is possible to be totally present in the moment much more often. This state of presence is the key to loving life.

  When we strip away all of the filters and negative programming that has gone into our subconsciousness there is only love. Love comes in the shape of all the things that we have to be grateful for. Here is a list of things that I am grateful for right now....

  My family and friends, who have supported me through many testing times and taught me numerous lessons throughout my life. The fun and laughter that I experience regularly. The times that have stretched me to my limit and forced me to find resources from within that I never knew I had. The complete collapse of my business, personal relationship, finances and happiness last year. This brought me the most amazing insights into my own life that have catapulted me on my journey. The resulting awareness and congruence of my purpose have left a trail of positive outcomes and resolutions.

  I am grateful for the traveling that I have done and for the conditions that I live in. Having food, shelter and choice of how to spend my time. The sun is out today and when I focus I can hear the distant singing of birds. My health is good and I'm feeling great at the moment. The beauty of the trees and plants as I look outside is a gift.

  Of course, I could list the things that are not yet right in my life, which I'm sure could make an impressive list. However, this is not where I choose to put my focus in this moment in time. Instead I choose to see the beauty and wonder of life. I choose to set myself a purpose of bringing together a global community of people who will discover how to love their lives through the Walk Innovation process.

  This blog entry represents the start of a journey. I know my purpose and it's about helping myself through helping and connecting others. Walk Innovation works and I am excited to watch it unfold. It will not necessarily be the most easy task but it will unfold somehow. I don't know how but I don't need to because when the why is big enough the how will unfold as action is taken towards it.

  The difference between those who love their life when they get old and those that don't is the ability to live in the moment and accept the potential gifts that every given moment presents us. Whether that be through a compliment or the appreciation of the wonder and beauty surrounding us. 

  Put very simply, gratitude + purpose = Living in the moment + Happiness

It's Not the Destination - It's the Journey That Counts

  What great weather we are getting at the moment. At this time of year it is a pleasure to be out and about. Over the past two days I have walked over 20 miles and witnessed numerous things of beauty.

  

  Not having a car has some distinct advantages when the weather is this good. Today, as I walked to meet a client, I was able to witness the numerous flowers in bloom and the occasional butterfly brightening up the path.

  It is in such moments of gratitude for the things that are sometimes taken for granted that life becomes enriched. I can honestly say that, apart from the obvious physical benefits that go with walking, I'm feeling fantastic at the moment and look forward to utilising any further good weather that I should be gifted with.

  Ultimately, for me, it is the small things in life that make the biggest difference and I am feeling very grateful at the moment.

Happiness is Contagious - Are you Ready to Infect Someone With It?

  Last Saturday saw another Walk Innovation event held in Shenley. Twelve people turned out to find their respective paths and walk their talk. As this method is being pioneered by the attendees of each event - there is a sense of excitement as suggestions reign in to enhance the process and add to each event.

  It never ceases to amaze me how the path we walk bears so many synchronicities to the way we talk. I observed one group on Saturday as the issue unfolded. This led us into the middle of a muddy field. However, as the questioning process led towards solutions - the path improved - as did the awareness of where we were for our leader on the walk.

  It pleases me greatly to see how people's issues can shift in just a short time. 

  I was asked during one of my events whether I felt it was self-indulgent for people to spend an hour and a half talking about themselves. It is my opinion that we owe it to ourselves - and the people we love - to talk about ourselves. When we talk about the things that cause us problems to someone who doesn't know us - we get a unique insight on the issue(s). This leads to us being happier within ourselves. Research has proved that being happy not only effects us and our family - it spreads to our friends, the friends' of our friends and the friends' of our friends' friends.

  In short - happiness is contagious.